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by John Ludington

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Power Outage 01:43
All The World Is Finn (free) 06:04
Harry Tanous worries his thumbs in the lobby with the humming rug where the angry newspaper man shuffles about and just pretends. Good tequila and techno lights. That’s when he met the skinny brunette. She whipped off her thong and changed his life. And now there’s Finn. Four years later up the elevator where the man that snaps the news in his lap has succumbed to the big grey rug that hums. Harry Tanous worries his thumbs. Janette picks up Finn every other Monday at six. She’s bleached her hair blonde and now she drives a Chevette. Finns’ favorite color is blue, that’s what it’ll always be. She won’t color outside the lines and she won’t look up at me when the bitch drives away with my Finn in the back with her broken crayons and her perfect lines and her perfect mind. Harry Tanous the doc will see you now. She hides beneath the sink and cries whenever I do the dishes. What do I, how do I deal with her? The worst part is I think, I’m so glad she’s gone for the week. And one day she will speak. Doc, I’m an old man in my 20’s my records are ruined. She destroyed my collection in a temper tantrum. And I don’t know whatever Janette thinks but she acts like this whole autism thing is normal. And I want to get through to her. I don’t want anything to do with her I just want to ask her how do you deal? Because all the world is Finn and I’m in orbit out there looking in. I’ve read a book or two and I still don’t know what to do. It’s hard to keep the condiments around. She stacks them up and leaves them on the floor. She’ll only listen to Chopin sonatas. And just the one composed in C minor. And she just doesn’t understand discipline with those big blue eyes and she’ll pull you in. Harry, you’re doing great we’re out of time. There’s a world where daddy’s girl can’t say a thing. She may never will until she gets psychiatry. But he’s spending their last dime on his own therapy. Dr. Shultz and his wife Fran love Japanese. They’ve a cottage where she grows exotic peonies. Their daughter is grown and owns a small town dentistry. Thoughts won’t form for now they’ll only make word clouds. Finn might show me how the wind won’t stop on a dime.
These two-legged ones they feed me. Take me for runs call my name and I come. Most what they do is confusing. They stare at glowing boxes and they wait till the food cooks and later they’ll light cakes and make wishes. What I don’t understand is why they can’t just stay all day long and do nothing. Lavender is in bloom again. Bumble bees are buzzing ‘round. Don’t you want to run with me through the neighborhood front lawns. We’ll get lost and sleep under the clouds. Come home soon good friend of mine. The short ones aren’t as strange or lazy. They don’t watch the glowing box as much when they’re pups. I love their boldness and bravery. They scuffle flip and flop and they’re quick to stand up. They’re amazed when I bring back the stick. Throw it again. What I don’t understand is they can’t just stay all day long and do nothing. Stay home with me all the time we’ll keep the doors open wide. Let all the summertime come inside. Dump the kitchen out on the floor, have a feast and play some more. Come home soon good friend of mine. Chains, gates and ropes, locks and windows. Finally the door swings, you run they say stop. Sun rises high, they’re still sleeping. They wait till the thing beeps, they get loud in the wet room. They eat fast, I eat fast, they scratch me and go. What I don’t understand is they can’t just stay all day long and do nothing. I run to the end of the driveway and listen long after you’re out of site. Wait for you to come home again. Howling at the sirens, digging holes just to pass the time. Come home soon good friend of mine. Chasing birds at sundown. I hear you coming up the drive. Take me with you next time. Oh, you’re the perfect human. You can do no wrong in my eyes. Haven’t I been wonderful?
I got us a room at a little motel in the Adirondacks. No one will know where we've gone come tomorrow. Ted is setting up the estate sale for Sunday. So pack your mother's silverware set and your wedding dress. I won't be able to sleep till we're well past the Catskills. My heart is a ticking bomb and the sheets are sticking to me. And these headlines, they're bell chimes in my mind. "Ratings drop through the floor", "News stands blaze across the nation", "Rush plays Russian roulette” and "A billion profiles close on the internet". There were no memos on the desks, the coffee pots were dry. Anchors cradled their heads, some sat glassy eyed. I heard Beck attacked a cop in riot gear. They dragged him off screaming obscenities about women's rights and queers. They took Hannity away on a stretcher. No one knows why he collapsed. O’Reilly thought he was on the air. A liquored up, frothing mad cow. But the cameras weren’t rolling, reruns were on auto and no one was watching anyhow. Leave the light on, leave the light on or the stories I've spun, yeah the captions they come back to me. Good men ostracized, citizens fed with lies. Look, see their faces in this ruby red sunrise. When the mob started to form 'round building 1211, Avenue Of The Americas. I made straight for the 8th floor, through the heavy elevator doors. He was dumbfounded at his desk and I said sir, ‘My wife and I are leaving and I swear I won't tell anyone where. The media war is over. Take my millions I really don't care.’ And I gave him the stocks, the retirement fund and he sat there. Deadpan like a dead man. Mr. Murdoch take my share. The intellectual revolution will not be controlled. And I fled through a swarm of locusts; independent reporters, activists raiding the fortress. Let's settle down in Portland like you've always wanted, leave this high rise and downsize to a cottage. You can teach humanities at a private school and I'll write freelance if anyone gives me a chance.
Eureka 01:44
Evening Gold 04:09
Sunlight through the blinds just turned evening gold and I wonder what it would've been like if i had grown old. Billions have all seen it, countless eyes and minds, beheld the in-between world just outside of time. Storm clouds on the town just released their souls and everything is blessed now but for the hungry ghosts. Our stockpiles in the distance burn up stacks of lies. Can you hear the semi's screaming the homeless lullaby? Captive beneath the boughs of the spreading chestnut tree, we cannot hear the clashing swords of the Trinity. If Abraham’s grandchildren kill indiscriminately then who will know their savior from their enemy? Now each night the wind calls me out to sea, bursting through glass windows, thrashing in my sheets. And in all my nightmares I run to higher ground. I thought to live forever. The sea she hunts me down.
I was sixteen when my folks sent me to Taunton, put me on a coach and put hope in that new institution. They called it a Kirkbride, a break in medical science. Beautiful on the outside. I spent my youth feeling trapped, breathing fast. At night by lamplight my mother’s sad face would go black. They were all convinced, declared me lunatic. And I have been ever since. My first ride on a coach, I was silent. The gibbous moon followed me all the way to the asylum. A magnificent palace. Thought I’d found solace. Three orderlies ushered me in. I still woke nights in panic. Madmen howl when drugs run dry. Room 14, 3rd floor, west wing. Not sure how long I’ve been here. I lurked these walls while they rotted. Watched the dome and cupola fall. And I won’t tell how the fire started I’m just glad you’ve come for us all. Just in time, I knew someone would walk with me. Will you light my cigarettes and keep talking? Yeah, I know who you are, you walk free with the living. Now that daylight is pouring in I can tell the difference. Do you see us while taking our hospital down? With this hoard, to the woods behind Taunton State grounds. Curse this place and my misdiagnosis. I wish I were sober, I’d show you I’m sane. There’s a kid in a car being followed by Luna. Hell if I know where the fishes go when they wiggle off in the mire. Whispered: Yes, I know who you are. Room 14 with the thorazine. Tell me about your whores. Is is Renee and Geanene? Do you do them together or do they live a lie? Not again, not the rubber room. I swear I wont fight. Fuck this place and your misdiagnosis…
Amaryllis 03:59
Amaryllis, are you with us, Amaryllis? Will you bless us and fulfill us? Have you left us? Won't you lift us up and fill us up again? She's a magic turtle. In my wildest dreams she talks and flies. I believe the words behind her painted eyes.
Tied up, feeling sick like I knew that I would. Tried hard in my leotards fighting for good. Mom always said, “Put your head to it, you can do anything.” Now I’m banging out my thoughts on this rug among other things. Doing lunch with the fussy bunch, salsa and beans. They never burp, never fart, looking good in their jeans. They learn to be bad better with every warning they hear. They wear them tight, striped sweaters and whisper shit in my ear.
Dizzy 04:52
Day in and day out it's the same over and over. After hours, asleep in his office chair. The building's closed and he's drooled on his finger. And this dream has come out of nowhere. Papa sent me here to take away your wallet. You can keep your shoes you’ll need them when we’re through. No you mustn’t struggle, please be still so I can bind your wrists and rummage through your shit. This birth certificate, these bills and every document that serves as proof of you will all go up a flue. Steady while I blindfold you we've got a ways to go and first you'll have a drink of bright lavender hue. Off with the sash look your past is in ashes. Take through this tube Papa's sorcerous liquid. Welcome your fears and give in to the visions. Crawl through this hole and we enter the chasm. Dizzy, give it time, let the fizzle settle in. Don’t you choke on papa’s heliotrope or dribble it on your chin. Come this way, do watch yourself. Pay no mind to Roswell, she’s just had her teeth cleaned, it always makes her mean. Dizzy take it slow while we travel down below. Don’t you crack your skull on hematite or stub each one of your toes. Over this log here, watch your step. This cavern is covered in moss. How's the fizz? I'll hold it dear, while you hobble across. Further down the crevice you will find a raging wind and deep within the cracks you'll find your passage home where you begin. Your longest journey is beneath the surface of the earth and here's the end, behold, the ancient waters subterranean. Solid walls of glass. The bats and stalactites hang all lit up from within with phosphorescent glow. It's Monday night and the garbage trucks are running. He gets up and wipes the drool from his finger. Day in and day out it's the same over and over. And this dream has come out of nowhere.
Snowing in my room. The rest of my life is somewhere walking with a friend. I'm sixteen again sitting cross-legged and making a mixtape for you.
Adults aren't fun, I don't wanna be one. They'll put you in the corner while they're doing their budget. All the suds in my tub deflated when Dad pulled the head off my Barbie 'cause he thought it was funny. Now my face is soggy 'cause her head's all wobbly. Can I just have an overnight, yell all we want till the neighbors bang brooms? We'll break out bassoons. Crawl around the moon like a pack of space monkeys. Like we were when we were seven. I don't wanna be eleven. All our legs grew tall, we walk at the mall and everything else is weird


The project, 'Finn', began two years ago. After a piece of recording equipment I had recently purchased decided to go bonkers on me, I put it all up on a high shelf. I walked into the furniture and shortly after that, I did a musical, which took up much of my creative time and energy. When I returned to the project, I decided not to let lack of funds or faulty equipment get in my way. That's really when the vision for 'Finn' began. It would be fun, creative, inventive. I started getting musicians to do impromptu stuff with me at open mics, just playing whatever instruments were handy. I began recording with random items around the house and borrowing instruments from friends. A few songs were added to the album including 'Snowing In my Room', 'Space Monkeys', and 'Amaryllis'. Some sound effects that aren't listed on the credit page include water droplets in the tub, metal objects in the oven and my stomach growling. Many local, Humboldt musicians are on ‘Finn’ as well as a long distance collaborator, all of whom are listed below and on the credit page.


released January 7, 2012

Mastered by Ryan Roberts at Sidenote Studios
Recorded and mixed by John Ludington
Cover art by Toby Goodshank
Layout and design by John Ludington and Andrea Zvaleko
Illustrations of People With Red Bags by Cade Burkhammer / Turtles by Kerri Kowal and Oliver Kowal / Space Man & Ship and Sailor & Hearts by Adrienne Schreiber
All songs written by John Ludington
©&℗ 2011 John Ludington
John Ludington: acoustic guitars and vocals, electric guitars (except on Amaryllis), bass guitars, melodica, mandolin (except on Amaryllis), banjo (except on Amaryllis), gong, keyboards, box of colored pencils, suitcase, bamboo stick, birdcage, glockenspiel, washboard, saw, kazoo, wooden box and mouth trumpet
Amanda Lake: violin on Chasing Birds At Sundown and Snowing In My Room
Anders Griffen: drums on All The World Is Finn, Chasing Birds At Sundown and Let’s Settle Down In Portland
Andrea Zvaleko: backup vocals on All The World Is Finn and Where The Fishes Go
Cade Burkhammer: kitchen utensils, pots, gong and the Atari 2600 game (Galaxian) on Fighting For Good
Chris Bird Jowaisas: mandolin on Amaryllis
Ian Davidson: banjo on Amaryllis
Justino Perez: cello on Let’s Settle Down In Portland, Where The Fishes Go and Snowing In My Room
Kahvi Garrett and Ariana Jade: backup vocals on
Chasing Birds At Sundown
Ryan Roberts: electric guitar on Amaryllis
Tofu Mike Schwartz: drums on Amaryllis
Construction sounds from the H St construction site in Arcata / Cartoon sounds from Tom & Jerry ‘Quiet Please’

for shows and full discography go to www.johnludington.com


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